I help people find space around the hard stuff. We often feel emotional sensation in the pattern of a wave. It arises, intensifies, peaks, and falls just like ocean waves rolling onto the shore.
I live in an amazingly beautiful place by the ocean. The Pacific Ocean has been quite rough here the last few weeks. I hadn’t been out to the view the local blow hole this season. I went there recently with the idea to share the natural beauty of my home with you.
Emotions Are Like Waves
As I watched the ocean and filmed the video I talked about how emotions are like the waves. We can often get lost in the intensity of emotions or dissociate from feelings in the body. In the long run neither of these strategies work. I practice not getting lost in the intense sensations of emotions and I teach my clients how to do this too.
One of the ways to not get lost and to stay grounded and aware in the midst of hard emotions or physical sensations, such as pain, is to allow the sensations. As they arise and fall like a wave, notice what your body feels like outside of the wave of hard stuff. Notice how parts of you are already safe and stay connected with your body sensations. This brings a sense of safety to your nervous system in the midst of stress and helps your nervous system to return to normal and comfort more quickly.
Relaxed Open Spaciousness
You can even notice what the space around you feels like, noticing where your body sensations stop and where the space around you begins. I had a yoga teacher who talked about relaxed open spaciousness. Cultivating a sense of relaxed open spaciousness in the body and focusing there while allowing yourself to feel what is already present can help you move through difficultly without getting stuck in it.
Space Around the Hard Stuff
Here is my video of the blow hole where I talk about finding space around the hard stuff.